We are living in a very individualistic world. Consequently, we always worry but about what concerns us. We want the best to happen to us but care less of what happens to others. This selfish approach to life is also reflected in the way we keep friendship. We want our friends to be the best—doing the thing we want but we care less about doing the things our friends want.
Are you a selfish friend or a selfless friend? Do you care to be a good friend or you want your friends to be good to you?
A careful consideration of the following 13 indicators, we unfailing reveal the type of friend you are:
1-Anyone Who Does Not Accept his friend’s Vision
Some people laugh each time their friend announces a new project for his life. When David (1 Sam 17:237-29) announced to his brothers that he wanted to fight Goliath, his brothers laughed and rebuked him saying he was unable. Do you accept and encourage your friend in his new ambitions? Or you mock and laugh, trying to convince him that he is not capable and qualified to do it. A bad friend mocks but a good one encourages. A lot of people have gone further than they thought they could because someone else thought they could.
2-Anyone Who Does Not Expect his friend’s Vision
The moment your friend announces his plans, do you accept it and start expecting it? Or you just accept to please him but do not believe it can really happen? I remember when I told a brother sometimes ago that I was to writing a book, he so believed it that from time to time he asked me whether I was through with writing it. That is what it means to expect a vision.
3-Anyone Who Does Not Respect his friend’s Vision
Some people underestimate their friend’s aspirations; and count it as mere ambition. Someone who respects a vision will start by respecting the carrier of the vision. But if you continue belittling your friend after he has announced his vision to you, it is an indication that you don’t believe the vision. “The really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.” Mark Twain
4-Anyone Who Does Not Protect Your friend’s Dream
Are you angry when you hear some criticize your friend’s plans? If you do then you are protecting the plan. But if someone seats beside and speak ill of your friend’s plan without reacting then you are not protecting that vision.
5- Are you challenging your friend to obey God?
Anyone who encourages the other to obey God is a good friend. Because only obedience to God helps us become what God wants us to be. If you fail to challenge your friend to obey God, you are a bad friend.
6-Those you defend your friend in his Absence?
A real friend is not he who defends you in your presence; a real friend does it even in your absence. There are some people who will pretend to love you when they are in front of you but speak ill of you when you turn your back. Therefore to prove to your friend that you are useful, learn to defend him in his absence.
7-are you Following a Dream?
When you meet someone who has a purpose in life and is following it, it makes you happy as also serves as a challenge to you. Just as it is with you, so it is with your friend. So, live a life of purpose and your friend will profit much from it.
8-Are you always willing To Contribute Something to Your friends life?
Are you openly indicating that you want to contribute something in your friend’s life? May be an advice, an idea, or money to help him fulfill his destiny? Make that one your friend. Welcome such in your life and respect the relationship and you will never regret it.
9-Do you Prize Integrity?
There are some people with very low moral standards. They have very poor values. But there are others who highly esteem integrity. This last group of people can be of great help. Close association with one who refuses to compromise with circumstances he does not like is an asset that can never be measured in terms of money.
10-Do you constantly appreciate your friend?
William James who said, “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.” Just as you need appreciations, so your friend does. Be the first to provide the need.
11-Do you easily forgive your friend?
Almost all emotional problems and stress come from unresolved conflicts, failure to have developed right relationships with people. Because of these many people including you, have a deep desire for total forgiveness. A forgiving spirit is one basic necessary ingredient for a solid relationship. If you can truly forgive then you are a good friend.
12-Do you dare listen when your friend has something to say?
Anyone who gives his ears to listen when you are talking indicates that he respects and considers you. People want those who can listen when they have something to say. You surely know how it feels when you have something to say and the other person won’t listen. Why not teach others by doing to them what you want them to do to you?
13-Do you try to understand your friend?
A good friend tries to understand the other’s personality and this way of functioning. Do you know that many people never bother to know how you function; all they want is that you do it their own way. Any person, who understands the other, or tries to do so, is a good friend.
ARE YOU A GOOD OR A BAD FRIEND?
God bless you!